A bit of a two parter to my last post, about skinny shaming and fat shaming, but today we will be talking about my flat ass!
I’ve never been the most curvy girl. I’m small, tiny and my features are very flat. My younger cousin (he was like 6) once called my figure, ‘straight.’ I lack curves, I lack volume and I lack an ass.
Growing up, it wasn’t the biggest problem of mine. I was probably the latest to ‘bloom’ out of my friends, my boobs didn’t start growing until half way through high school and only in the last couple years of my life, they’ve actually been considered average. (Bare in mind I’m 20.) Comments from friends growing up was prominent, they were aware, I was aware and it was always a thing on the back of my mind. Then, big booty culture took a turn into society.
Big booty culture is important, for sure. There are a lot of factors which connote why it became big in society, but I think the main contenders are our rise in body confidence and as always, the biggest worldwide influencers, The Kardashians.
Now everyone was thriving for a bigger butt! Gym memberships rose as women started learning what circuits were best for creating a bigger butt, women were obsessed with the idea of having a bigger butt and a lot of people were left incredibly insecure, because for some people, it is an impossible achievement.
I too went to the gym, did all the squats that I could, paired with other circuit exercises that my sister forwarded to me. I grinded and for sure, I saw a difference, I was toning, but my ass was still small. That’s because I’m small.
I think the worst part of this whole situation for me too, is whenever I spoke about this situation to friends or boyfriends, they would just give me advice on how to make my butt bigger. It was never love yourself, or body confidence, it was ‘well this is what I do’, ‘you’re right, your butt is so small’, ‘you’re so bony lmao.’ For years, I felt a huge disconnect with people who I thought were friends and it really began to eat at my mental health. My insecurity with my lack of shape grew and my friends weren’t helping.
Comments are still prominent. Even though I’ve spent the last year really trying to clutter the junk out of my friendship circles, comments are still there. Comedic or not, they still hurt and they can still keep you awake at night.
When I realised my friends weren’t there, the importance grew of why I need to love myself. No one else was doing it, I couldn’t expect anyone else to do it, so it just clicked. My mentality and happiness changed so much the day I realised, this is just how I am. This is how I’m built. Why stress out and cry and tear my health apart, just to condone to what society wants off me.
I’ve got a flat ass, guys. I’m probably always going to have a flat ass. If you’ve got something to say about it, you can happily kiss my-